Let's Go Shopping
by Silberman Was Here
Summary: Malik wins a contest and has 3 hours to spend 10,000. Comedy ensues and Bakura likes chicken.
1. I Won?

Disclaimer: I Don't Own Yugioh  
  
Kyoté Moon: Hello, all. I know I'm writing another fic right now but I got this idea when I was listening to the radio. This contest is real! But I'm too young to enter. ;_;  
  
()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()  
  
Chapter 1: I Won?  
  
(thunder and lightening and lots of wind and rain, ya know, a storm)  
  
It was a dark and stormy night... in Transylvania. But our story takes place in Domino Town.  
  
(scene changes to Domino City)  
  
Any way, Malik and his "posse" were here to visit their good friends. Actually, no one really liked Marik except Bakura since the whole Battle City fiasco. So he checked into a big fancy hotel, even though he couldn't pay for it. (He usual just takes over the peoples minds and gets away for free) Anyway, after he unpacked, Marik decided to hit the town.  
  
Malik: I'm heading out for a while. I'll be back around dinner.  
  
Isis: Not so fast! You're not supposed to go out alone anymore. Especially after what happened with all of those Rare Hunters. Go with Rishid.  
  
Malik: I'm old enough to be out on my own. And what are you planning? I don't think you're going to stay here this whole time. You're going to see the Pharaoh, aren't you?  
  
Isis: (blushing) What are you talking about?  
  
Malik: You know what I'm talking about. I've see all those pictures of you two together. You only want Rishid to go with me so you can go alone with Yami, don't you?  
  
Isis: (madly blushing) I really don't know what you're talking about! I have to go, right now, to, uh, check on the car! (runs out the door)  
  
Malik: But we took a cab here. Well, I guess you're coming to watch me, Rishid? Rishid?  
  
Malik looked around the hotel room to find that Rishid left a note on the kitchen counter. (Hey, Malik took over the owner's mind. They got the best suite. I think there's a plane in there somewhere, next to the pool and the combination milkshake machine and porno sorter. Malik really picked out the perfect room. ^_^) He picked up the note and read it.  
  
Dear Malik and Isis ( If she hasn't already left to see Yami),  
I needed to run some errands involving robbing a bank and will either be back shortly or in 10-15 years. Be good and don't get into trouble. If you do, I'll know because you'll probably join me in prison. See you later. I hope.  
Rishid Malik: Well, that solves my problem.  
  
So Malik decided to look around the town for any of his old friends. Yeah, friends. After about an hour of looking around, he found himself in the park. Malik was pretty bored, so he decided to take a walk through the park and then get something to eat. Suddenly, from out of no where, a guy holding a radio over his head wearing only a tank top and a dirty pair of underwear came running down the path and bumped into Marik.  
  
Marik: Hey, what's your problem?  
  
Crazy guy: (shaking a bottle of pills) I gots pills!  
  
Malik: Yes well that's very nice.  
  
Crazy Guy: You're very nice! Cookie monster! (laughs maniacally and runs off)  
  
Malik: Hey wait! You forgot your, I mean, my radio.  
  
Radio: Hello, friends. Do you like money?  
  
Malik: Yes.  
  
Radio: Are you an evil sadistic bastard?  
  
Malik: Yes.  
  
Radio: Can you answer simple questions?  
  
Malik: Yes.  
  
Radio: Is your sister probably making out with a 5,000 year old Pharaoh right now?  
  
Malik: Probably, yes.  
  
Radio: Then you can enter 91.3 WGMX's $10,000 Shopping Spree!  
  
Malik: Neat.  
  
Radio: Just come down to the WGMX building located in the park right next to where Malik Ishtal is standing between the hours of 11:30 and 11:31.  
  
Malik looked to his right and conveniently to his right was the WGMX building and according to his Rolex, (I love giving him such cool stuff) it was 12 seconds past 11:30.  
  
Malik: That's really convenient. As if someone planned this whole thing. That this life is actually a story for someone's amusement and that I was put here by some higher being that is controlling my every move and action.  
  
Kyoté Moon: Ah, the wonder that is life. It seems my job is done.  
  
Malik: But you didn't do anything.  
  
Kyoté Moon: (chuckles) Did I? (disappears like on Star Trek when they get beamed up)  
  
Malik: That was strange and irrelevant. I better get inside. (goes into the station)  
  
Suddenly, a guy with blond hair and a little goatee ran up to Malik with a microphone.  
  
Radio Host Guy: Congratulations! You've won 91.3 WGMX's $10,000 shopping spree!  
  
Malik: But I didn't do anything.  
  
Radio Host Guy: I know, but you're the only one who could possibly fit those criteria!  
  
Malik: Neat.  
  
Radio Host Guy: You can choose 2 friends to go with you in the 3 hours that you have.  
  
Malik: But I only have one friend.  
  
Radio Host Guy: *_* Really? That's pathetic! Well, here's $10,000 and an arm braclet.  
  
Malik: What's the bracelet for?  
  
Radio Host Guy: It has a timer. When the three hours is up, any money you didn't spend will burn! Your time begins now!  
  
Clock: 3:00:00  
  
Malik: That was unexpected. I'd better find Bakura so that we can go "shopping"! (when he says this, he brushes against the hair on the side of his head with his hand) Now why would I do that? Oh well. (runs off to find Bakura)  
  
()()()()()()()()()()  
  
Kyoté Moon: Well, that was the end of Chapter 1. Now, Malik has to find Bakura and get the maximum amount of shopping done in his three hours. But who, I'm sorry, whom will he choose as his other person? It can't be Yami, Isis, Rishid or Ryou. Send in who you want and they just might get picked.  
  
Please R&R 


	2. Yugi gets his comeuppance!

Disclaimer: I Don't Own Yugioh  
  
Kyoté Moon: HELLO!!!!!!! I AM SO SORRY!!!!!  
  
Malik: (looking up from his newspaper) What?  
  
Kyoté Moon: I'm sorry I haven't written in so long! I've had homework and finals and I'm so sorry! Please forgive me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Malik: Oh, have you been gone? I didn't notice. (goes back to reading the paper)  
  
Kyoté Moon: What? How could no one have known that I've been gone?  
  
Malik: I don't know. One thing I know, the chapter ended, then I sat down to read, the Earth spun around a lot around the sun, it snowed a lot, then it all melted, then it was summer, and then the trees died, and then it snowed again, and now you're here!  
  
Kyoté Moon: You've been reading the paper for all of this time?  
  
Malik: Yes! It's even funnier backwards. The first letter of every line in this article spells "I'M BEING HELD AGAINST MY WILL. PLEASE BRING HELP. I WILL GIVE YOU MY MILLENNIUM ROD IF SOMEONE GETS ME OUT OF THIS FIC. I AM BEING VERY SERIOUS. I HAVEN'T EATEN IN WEEKS AND BAKURA STOPPED MOVING THREE DAYS AGO." Isn't that weird?  
  
Kyoté Moon: Yes, yes it is. Malik, are you unhappy here?  
  
Malik: No, not at all. Everything is peachy! (whispering) Please help me!  
  
Kyoté Moon: You've said too much! To the tundra with you!  
  
Malik: NOOOOO! (disappears and reappears in the frozen tundra) Great. Now I'm stuck here. It's cold, but at least I have food. Hey you, little doggy! Come here!  
  
Wolf: (growls and run towards Malik foaming at the mouth)  
  
Malik: Now that's what I call respect.  
  
(back at Kyoté Moon Studios)  
  
Kyoté Moon: I can only imagine that a wolf is attacking Malik right now.  
  
Bakura: (yawn) I just woke up from a three-day nap. Did I miss anything?  
  
Kyoté Moon: Not much. Now, on with the story.  
  
( )=Action // //= Thinking ()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()  
  
Ryou: Hmm? I got an e-mail: Dear, Ryou. How do you get your hair to be white? Is it natural? And could you please answer all of the questions that die-hard Ryou fans have really been wanting to here? Sincerely, Kevin Dubrough, MA (he reads it as "mah") Alright, then. I think the question everyone wants answered is the real truth about my relationship with the spirit of the Millennium Ring. I can honestly say that the spirit and I are... Malik: (bursts through the door) Hey, Bakura! I just won $10,000. You want to go shopping?  
  
Bakura: (taking control of Ryou) Boy, do I! (in his rush deletes the e- mail) Let's go!  
  
Malik: Actually, we need a third person.  
  
Bakura: Who do you have in mind?  
  
Malik: Well, no one. Let me see your computer. www.fanfiction.net, Search, Yugioh, Let's Go Shopping!, reviews...I guess everyone voted for Kaiba.  
  
Bakura: Kaiba? He's no fun. Plus, he's already rich. And stuck up.  
  
Malik: There was a vote for Otogi.  
  
Bakura: Who?  
  
Malik: (sigh) Duke Devlin.  
  
Bakura: Ohhh! No, he scares me a little. His hair is...(shudders)plus he's rich, too.  
  
Malik: The only other vote was for Ryou.  
  
Ryou: I'll do it!  
  
Bakura: No you won't I want to go!  
  
Malik: We're wasting time! We need to choose now!  
  
Radio Host Guy: He's right! Time is ticking!  
  
Bakura: How did you get in here?  
  
Radio Host Guy: The door was open! And so is this window! (jumps out of it)  
  
Malik: So who are we taking?  
  
Bakura: Wait. I have an idea...  
  
*A little later*  
  
Yugi: Wow! It sure is nice of you guys to take me on your big shopping trip with you.  
  
Bakura: Oh, it's really...(tries to take the Millennium Puzzle when Yugi isn't looking, but Yugi turns back around)...our pleasure.  
  
Malik: Yes, I can think of no better...(also tries to take the Puzzle, but can't get it in time)...way to spend the afternoon than with my only friend and mortal enemy.  
  
Yugi: *_* Um, thanks?  
  
Malik: (glances at the clock)  
  
Clock: 2:41:35  
  
Malik: We'd better hurry up. Where are we going first? What do I want most in the world? Hmm...(glances at the Puzzle) //In due time, Malik. In due time.// Oh, I know! How about a plasma screen TV?  
  
Bakura: That will cost too much. We need to divide the money equally.  
  
Yugi: But 10,000 doesn't go into three evenly.  
  
Bakura and Malik: (look at each other, than at Yugi)  
  
Yugi: (tied to a tree) I though we were friends!  
  
Malik: You think a lot of things!  
  
Bakura: Don't worry. I'm sure someone will come get you! (quietly) By sunrise.  
  
Malik: So, um, I get the Puzzle, right?  
  
Bakura: Why should you get it?  
  
Malik: Because you can't understand the true powers it holds. And because I'm the protagonist of this fic.  
  
Bakura: Pro-tag-on-ist?  
  
Malik: protagonist n. The main character in a drama or other literary work. In ancient Greek drama, the first actor to engage in dialogue with the chorus, in later dramas playing the main character and some minor characters as well.  
  
Bakura: Oh, now I understand.  
  
Malik: Alright, so we each have 5 grand. What are we going to buy?  
  
Bakura: Oh, how about some the Millennium Items?  
  
Malik: If you aren't going to think positively, I'll take back my money.  
  
Bakura: Fine. I have some things of my own to buy. We'll meet at the Wendy's here at noon.  
  
Malik: I was unaware there was a Wendy's in Domino Town. Hey wait. Where is Domino Town?  
  
Bakura: What? How could you not know where you are?  
  
Malik: I forget.  
  
Bakura: Isn't it obvious? We're in...  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Kyoté Moon: HA! Thought I was gonna tell you, didn't I? Well, actually I'm not really sure. They are supposed to by in Japan, but the dub makes references to them being in America. Maybe for the sake of reason I'll make it a Burger World. What do you guys think? I'll write the results next chapter. What do the people think: is Domino Town in America or Japan? 


End file.
